October 28th - my 30-something b-day

So yesterday October 28th was my 30-something-ish birthday. I'm not going to disclose my exact age hahaha...that's my little secret. Though you know I'm at LEAST 30.

My birthday celebration apparently started Monday afternoon...when two of my friends came over, surprised me, and took me out. They brought gifts and treated me to Marble Slab - I had a mix of caramel & amaretto with almonds in a waffle cone - YUM! Then in the evening, my husband took me out to Chili's (one of the only restaurants in our little town) where I had a sirloin, loaded mashed potatoes, some broccoli and veggies doused in pepper, and their Molten Chocolate Cake. DECADENT! The waiter was kind enough to announce my age as 21 to the whole restaurant.

Afterwards I did do more work...b/c I'm just like that. And dh had to wait till late for me to finish...but then the bday celebrations continued to the actual b-day day. So yesterday - on my actual birthday, I didn't do any work at all. I spent the day hanging out with my daughter & doing whatever we wanted. (I got her to sorta sing Happy Birthday to me - I sang it to myself with her a bunch - silly me.) We watched videos, I played this game that dh has gotten me addicted to recently. We did end up going to the grocery store in the afternoon, but then the evening was relaxed. Just exactly how I wanted it (especially after a long tiring weekend in San Antonio.) We had chocolate cake & ice cream. Thanks for all of the birthday wishes from my family & friends during the day and on facebook. Facebook can make a girl feel really popular.

Stress levels

So I'm going to post this here since I'm not allowed to post non-Hannah stuff on her blog anymore apparently...dh doesn't approve.

My stress levels today totally went sky high. Not like frazzled or crazy nerves...but the amount of things I need to do in the next week feels like it's exponentially multiplied...

it didn't help that the daughter was screaming and not wanting to nap - though she did fall asleep and WAS asleep until I tried to crawl out of bed...then she woke up, startled and didn't fall back asleep for an hour. I left her in her bed for the "naptime" allotted time...and felt bad & stressed out the whole time she was screaming bloody murder.

Granted, I've had a lot to do...photo processing...lots of weddings and photo shoots...and things to do for the biz - one of the big ones is the website that's not getting any time or attention. The Primary Program. Other ppl. Church responsibilities...family responsibilities....friend & neighbor responsibilities...

the CCSO....Danny called Tuesday and reminded me that I needed to get my music resume out to them ASAP...so i spent Tuesday working on it, and I sent it off...sad little piddly thing - my music resume. I've had resumes so I could work for the man...and scientific C.V....but never did I have a music resume... I just didn't. b/c I didn't need it. and since quitting my corporate job, I haven't wanted to work for the man, so the last updated resume I had is from 2004 or Jan 2005.

Anyways...so today I got some of the excerpts for the audition...which is in a week. yeah...let's see what i can do to polish up my skills in a week... Thank goodness for technology! On the internet I was able to find the complete orchestral scores and video recordings of both! And there was an attached pdf link to the 1st page of an excerpt. CCSO is going to snail mail me the Mozart #39 excerpt-pretty easy. But the Strauss Don Juan...I'll need some time to practice...and I did that today... YIKES! um yeah...not pleasant to hear. i butchered it. at one time maybe I could have sightread the sucker...but not today.

And then I tried to find a solo that sounded half decent. Never mind that I can't find any of my solo music... I had 2 pieces in my vln case...so I'm choosing the one with nice clean copies so I can make copies for the 5 judges. yeah... auditions...
um...and so it's a Sonata. not a Concerto. oh well... they just said solo.

It's funny...b/c I've wanted to play in a symphony for the past few years...until I discovered photography and the business has grown this year...and so now I'm a little overscheduled...or over-something-or-the-0ther.

it's late...i should not be rambling on a blog...i should either be productive getting work done, or ASLEEP. which is what dh is doing... wise man that he is.

New tools!

YAY! I got my new 50mm f1.4 lens last Friday. Monday night I ordered Lightroom 2.0 from this vendor we found online...and it just came TODAY! Just NOW - the UPS guy showed up at our doorstep! I was totally surprised! SUPER DUPER fast and speedy and for $1.99 shipping! I like this new vendor! Thanks Johnathan for your help too!

Last week we also got 2 new batteries for my camera & 2 new 4GB CF cards.

I'm excited for Lightroom 2.0!!! Now I have it before this weekend's wedding and next weekend's wedding. Now to get it all set-up with presets...

Memories

Alright, I got this off of a friend's blog. I am interested in what peeps have to say. So I'm going to post this on all the blogs...depending on which one you link to.

Here are the directions:
1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I have had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember.
2. Next, repost these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It is actually pretty funny to see the responses.

Strobist intro

You Tube has lots of videos...some rather informative/instructional.
This is a little introduction for beginning strobists:

Distortion

So this is video is pretty cool...I sorta wish I had these Photoshop skills.

It does make a statement about "beauty"
Distortion of "real" into "created" and perceived beauty.

The Power of Photoshop...

everything commercial is photoshopped nowadays.
you can't believe everything you see.

new camera

crazy us... we've...mainly i've, been hemming and humming and hawing the past month or two over cameras... 40d? 5d? 40d? 5d? ahhh!

and then tonight....or now last night...we purchased a new camera on amazon... YOWZERS!

5 minutes later, i cancelled the order, and purchased a different camera... double the price

and now i'm STILL wavering!!! (over the costs...not the desire for a new camera)

i know. the camera is just a TOOL. but oh...what an expensive tool it is to upgrade. i decided that i really really wanted full frame...and then the 40d was "affordable" and i had talked to a canon rep that said the 40d has newer technology than the 5d, and unless i really want to blow up my pics really big, i didn't need the 5d...but oh...how i'd like the low light performance...

i've been holding off many weeks... yet this morning i had my friend & colleague call and compliment me on some of my photos...and also comment on the limitations that my current camera made on the quality of the low light photos from a wedding (saying my photos would have been even better with a better camera)....

and the current instant canon rebates which expire on july 19...which is now...like today.
oh and the $50 mail in upgrade rebate (which we don't qualify for b/c you have to HAVE the camera in hand and enter in the serial number by today july 19th...and we just ordered our camera and it's not delivered)

i should be totally excited and jumping up and down....but i feel anxiety b/c for us right now it's such a huge chunk of cash...

after i returned from meeting with a wedding client this afternoon...dh & i "discussed" and both felt peace about the 40d. so we bought it. afterwards, i made some comments that i was wondering if i really was upgrading (yes upgrading technology) but not upgrading image quality.

then dh was like..."just get the 5d!" which was VERY uncharacteristic of him...but the prices are low now (comparatively to a few months ago/last year) ....but b/c canon is probably going to release another new improved camera this fall??? rumors rumors. and with digital technology, prices just get lower and lower over time, right?

i should really invest in more glass...but the 5d is a huge improvement...some have called it a "classic" (in the digital world...a classic is only a few yrs old!)

ahhh! what glass would i get next if i didn't get a camera???
the very expensive 70-200mm f2.8L IS lens? or the wide angle 16-35mm???
most likely the 85mm 1.8 prime. i should get the 24mm 1.8 prime after that.
primes are good...and affordable...and super sharp...

but really...my current camera body fits a lot of my needs...and my current lenses too...

it's about expanding the business. and expanding the tools.
i should probably invest in a unique and custom website??? but the blog has been working for me. oh... the $$$ it takes to run a business.

i should be super duper happy and excited!

i am ...but it's accompanied by anxiety over $$$costs$$$. i didn't want to tap into family funds to expand the business. i wanted the business to fund itself...or do a small business loan.

especially since we know the importance of having a year's supply and the $ was supposed to be to help us finish & add to our year's supply & emergency funds.

decisions, decisions

i've been researching & trying to decide what new equipment to buy. i really want to upgrade to a full frame dSLR and want some new lenses. since finances are a limiting factor (the business is funding itself - no debt or dipping into family funds), i need to decide what is most essential and of most value and worth as a next purchase.

wise advice i came across today: "always buy the best lens and least expensive non-discontinued dSLR"
which reinforced what i'd already decided...to buy the best lens for the purpose that i needed (good glass always retains its value - like the canon L series)...and the least expensive camera that does what i need it to do (the 5d as the best bet for a full-frame dSLR)

spent a lot of time searching details, prices, and ratings today. which was a very very good thing b/c the past 2 days i'd been highly considering buying some equipment that seemed like a great deal from a online retailer that i found from a google search. good thing that i did further research through the forum at Amazon.com and also ResellerRatings.com and saved myself from being scammed or given the hook & bait. apparently there are a lot of shady camera stores out there operating under different names online, but seems to be the same operation. i actually called the online seller, TWICE, on hold forever both times, and both times the phone mysteriously disconnected during the call after i asked the customer service rep a question. avoid soniccameras.com and photodynasty.com - don't waste your time!

if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is! better to buy from a reputable dealer that's been proven reliable. like amazon, b&h, adorama...like so many people have recommended.

on a side note...
i also did a search for our casio privia digital piano a couple of months ago, and found an AWESOME deal at musician's friend where our particular model was hundreds cheaper than anywhere else i looked. it was cheaper than the base model sold at bestbuy (that we had planned to buy). i called musician's friend and they had 24/7 customer service which was great and i ordered the product. (i had called another competing online retailer earlier but got voicemail?!) at musician's friend, the guy did sell me an extended warranty, but it was only like $50, and he wasn't pushy or salesy. the piano arrived as scheduled and it plays great! today i did a search on resellerratings.com for musician's friend and they didn't score very well, but i had a good experience with them. but their reviews had a mix of negative and positive comments. the other camera places had all consistently negative stories.

being away from family...

as much as i love photography and shooting weddings...i'm really really sad to be away from my family. i just got home around 12:30am. hannah's asleep and isaac's asleep too. and we didn't get much family time together today b/c we've all been busy. (isaac was gone all morning till about noon-time helping out and doing service for someone in the ward since he's in the EQ Presidency. he was tired b/c he laid carpet and moved heavy stuff. and i needed a nap this afternoon b/c i've been burning the candle at both ends...and needed to recharge for tonight's event.)

last weekend's event was fun b/c isaac got to go with me and enjoy the evening. and we had a nice night out...but we did have to leave hannah with a sitter. i'm just hesitant about leaving hannah a ton b/c i'm worried about her and the allergies. and probably b/c i'm an overprotective mommy...

oh well...time to download photos and backup.

random dreams

so last night i dreamed that while i was photographing a session, i was standing on a really tall stack of books all piled up on each other to get an overhead shot. then the stack of books fell and so did i. so i missed the shot.

this afternoon i was taking a nap, and i dreamed that i was shooting a wedding with isaac... and we were both 2nd shooting with sarah diane & chad...then we ended up dancing a bunch at the reception - and the reception was strange (you know how dreams go) and ended prematurely b/c there were no people there, and i guess we didnt' have really anything to shoot.

ok...so do you think i have photography on the mind?

well...i should go get ready for this evening, b/c i AM 2nd shooting with sarah diane for a wedding reception at the american bank center.

Family & Motherhood

After a spiritual Enrichment last night, I wrote a long email to a friend that contained most of my recent "deep thoughts", but I thought I should also post something pertaining to those things that have most importance to me. Though those things that I hold most dear and close to me, I don't usually discuss openly - especially on a blog...

I've been pondering about how I prioritize my time. I've been spending a large chunk of time recently on photography and business pursuits. But in actuality, my role as a mother is first and foremost at this time in my life. It predominates my time. I am a mother to our adorable baby girl. She's growing up so fast and this is really a special and precious time that I need to cherish. She's a sponge - absorbing her surroundings, mimicking, learning and growing - physically, intellectually, psychologically, spiritually. Being her mother is the most important way I can spend my time. Teaching her, playing with her, patiently loving her, raising a healthy, well-rounded, educated, and kind contributor to society with integrity.

I've been reading a couple of essays/talks about motherhood by President Gordon B. Hinckley in the mornings this past week. And they've renewed my commitment to being a good mother - an attentive, loving and patient mother. And rearing children is truly a full-time job...not part-time...it is 24-7 all the time...and for the rest of my life...I will be a mother.

So that means more boundaries with time and our lives. Time is so precious... There is a sense of urgency to things these days. So much is happening around the world. So much information and data and events are all happening around us...it's an explosion of information & news! We are bombarded...but we have to consciously CHOOSE what information we let into our lives and integrate. Good quality information that uplifts and builds and makes one a better person - to build solid foundations of integrity in a person. Not the mass media marketing, flashy advertising, and fickle trends that come and go - things that don't last. We need to spend time, energy & money on things of lasting and eternal worth - not on things of no worth.

The family is the foundation...of so much!

I also came across this tidbit today by Neal A. Maxwell (I like all of his writings):
"...while we know parts of more and more people, we also know fewer and fewer people well; our parents tended to know fewer people but these they knew more fully. Since we know so many others, either functionally or fractionally, the family, in addition to its other blessings, also gives us our best opportunity for wholeness."

Wholeness...I feel whole with my family. This family with my dearest Isaac, the most wonderful husband I could have imagined, and my sweet dear Hannah. I feel so blessed. Never in my life have I felt so whole and complete. I am fulfilled - I feel so whole and so complete with them.

dreams...to reality!

so I never finished writing/posting about my "pre-event stress-dreams" from this weekend...but for context's sake, [b]ecker and David Jay were both in them - they were giving me advice.

anyways... just a little bit ago, i was taking a break from processing this weekend's 25th anniversary photos, and i decided to visit Jasmine Star's blog and lo and behold the 1st post (6.17.08) is about the "Free to Succeed" Seminar. i'm thinking...oh good...another seminar that i'd like to attend, but dream on. i continue to read on...and it says, "We’ll be starting the tour in Houston, Texas on July 29, 2008" and i was like YIPPPEEEE! and i scan really fast down the post, and see that the 1st 30 signups in each city get 50% off. so I click on the signup link and to see what's up.

well, the first stop is Houston and the 2nd stop is Austin...and I'm thinking...hmmm...which one? they're both about 3-4 hours away from me. i have friends in both places that i'd like to see...i think Austin is just a bit closer...and probably has less signed up right now... i checked the calendar...dh is out of town that week...my hands were almost shaking from excitement as i clicked around from webpg to webpg...

i quickly signed up and now i'm going to Austin to meet Jasmine & DJ on July 30th!!! And for $50 bucks too, I get to attend the seminar! i'm so excited! i'm really going to get real live advice from David Jay...not just in a dream! i even left a comment on Jasmine Star's blog! and i don't usually leave comments!

whooo hooo!!!

Schedule is filling up with photo processing

I was able to finish a bunch of photo projects today, and boy does it feel good! I ended up with more photography stuff the past week than I had anticipated. But as of now, I'm mostly caught up... until I fill my memory cards up again with more images from tomorrow's (or later today's) wedding (where I'm going as a 3rd shooter and for learning).

I designed and printed up the event cards myself for the 25th anniversary coming up, and I'm rather pleased with the results. I didn't order them from the online vendor b/c of turnaround time. I realized today I wouldn't get them in time for next week's anniversary party on Saturday. Since I just finished processing today all the photos from the "dress session" from Wednesday. I also finished processing the photos from the mom&baby session I did for Delilah on Tuesday.

I still have the family session to process from last weekend...but they're on summer vacation and not in a rush...

I just realized I have 3 shoots next week: 2 multiple peep shoots, and then the anniversary event on Sat. I'm going to be busy with post-processing!

And I've been pondering lots about the business-side of things... it's what my brain's been musing over on default mode...

I feel very blessed for all of these opportunities that have come my way.

I'd like to actually work on personal family photo and memories though...I haven't done a lot of processing of those at all...

our vegetable garden

one of the 1st things we did at the new home was plant a garden in the backyard in the dirt - so that was like march.

we have 6 rows in our veggie garden:

1. carrots
   
2. spinach
   
3. bell peppers & string beans
   
4. tomatoes
5. potatoes
6. herbs (basil, thyme) & broccoli
   

the bell peppers are growing very well. there are many plants with multiple peppers on them. all large. mostly green...one red right now.

the carrots aren't bad, though they're probably all squished together since we didn't thin them out as much as we should have.

the string beans were doing well...we ate a bunch of the beans a few weeks ago.

the spinach were flourishing well, but now they have a disease. don't know what it is, but the leaves are all spotted and yellowing. we didn't even get to eat any.

the tomatoes are half dead. they had great fruit, but then birds or what not have eaten some...and all of the ones that have fallen off. the leaves are half dead and we don't know what's wrong with them. some plants are worse off than others. they were flourishing a month ago and now they're all sad looking.

the potatoes are dying. though dh did harvest some cute ones out last week.

the basil is doing very well. we cook with the leaves regularly.
the thyme is doing better. one plant was about to die after we transplanted it, but now it's better.
the broccoli is growing well...lots of leaves, but it's flowering. it didn't ever really produce heads of broccoli, just branches of florets that one can't really eat.

gardening isn't my favorite thing to do...and i've been more neglectful of the garden than not...

the aloe vera we transplated is rejuvenating - turning green again. we probably overwatered it at 1st...(actually i put them in a bucket of water to "keep them alive" before we put them in the dirt...oops) and they were yellow for a long long time.

my strawberries died...b/c they were still in a pot & i forgot to water them (since they were on the side)

the cilantro is in a planter. it seeded and now is hanging on by a thread. i dunno if it's still alive.

it's getting hotter and hotter...we'll see how the plants handle it.

swarm of bees

totally random and totally scary.

this morning dh & i were weeding in the garden. we'd tackled a bunch of weeds and i was about to wrap it up.

suddenly i hear mass buzzing all around me as i was heading towards the patio. i turned around and there was a mass of black insects all in the air covering practically all the airspace of the size of the backyard. i freaked out (in my head i was like what? massive flies? black insects? did dh uncover some crazy insects in the weeds?)

i screeched and asked dh, "what is that?!?!"

he instantly replied, "get inside! call 911."

we both ran for the back door and quickly retreated inside our home.

dh said, "those are bees!"

as we peered out of our kitchen windows, we saw the mass quickly hover from the air covering our backyard into the air above our neighbors backyard.
we could still hear the buzzing through all of our double-paned closed windows.

they really just appeared out of nowhere! as just as fast as we noticed them, they were onto the next yard.

behind our yard, it's still a construction site. they haven't started building on the street, but it's paved. i don't know where the bees came from. but all of a sudden they were in our yard. and that ended our morning weeding. (a lot of weeding to still do - we're pulling weeds selectively - but the yard looks 100% better!)